Background
Women and men in Nordic countries are employed to almost the same extent, but work in various occupations and have different positions in the labour market [
1]. Although Sweden is working towards a firm political goal of gender equality, it is well known that Swedish women perform most of the unpaid work in the home [
2,
3]. Gender inequality within paid and unpaid work positions exposes women and men to different environments and responsibilities, and thus shapes their quality of life by affecting the prospect of good health either negatively or positively [
4,
5]. Most public health studies on housework are also quantitative, and knowledge of the relationship between health and domestic work experiences is limited. For example, in a previous Swedish study we found that unequal division of housework was associated with psychological distress among both women and men, but the data did not allowed for exploring the social processes behind this association [
6]. Furthermore, studies on this relationship among both women and men from a gender perspective are lacking. The aim of this study was to explore the housework experiences and practices among women and men and experiences of stress and perceived wellbeing from a gender perspective.
According to previous Nordic studies, combining work and family life can enrich one’s health, and the combined roles of employee, partner, and parent can protect against stress [
7,
8]. However, combining work and family life can also contribute to conflicting demands between the two, which has proven to increase the risk of mental illness and physical symptoms [
9,
10]. Additionally, a Swedish study has shown that it appears to be a critical point around which the workload resulting from combined waged work and housework could lead to either a decreased or increased risk of mental health problems [
11].
Women who work fulltime and are primarily responsible for domestic work often experience stress and illness, and lack time to care for themselves [
12]. In particular, mothers’ maintenance of their own health is inhibited due to numerous household and childcare responsibilities [
13]. These results can be related to a previous Swedish study showing that women tend to experience higher degrees of housework-related stress than men, which is related to diminished feelings of wellbeing [
8]. However, a heavy housework burden has also shown to correlate to mental illness among both women and men living in a Swedish context [
6,
14].
Moreover, the perception of fair distribution of household responsibilities is important for the wellbeing and may contribute to a marital and family satisfaction meanwhile the opposite perception may cause conflict [
14‐
16]. In a Swedish context, it has been shown that perceptions of fairness could potentially vary according to gender expectation. For example, if the social norm is that women perform the bulk of the domestic work, such a distribution of the work will more likely be perceived as fair [
17]. Relationships that include perceptions of unfairness can produce risk of distress, whereas fair and supportive partners in intimate relationships can contribute to marital satisfaction and help to improve wellbeing and reduce distress [
18,
19].
For this study, we viewed fairness in housework and marital satisfaction in heterosexual relationships as part of the construction of gender relations in everyday life [
20‐
23]. An important theoretical concept from this perspective is the division of labour by gender, which describes the expectation that certain housework tasks are to be performed by women while others are to be performed by men [
23,
24]. For example, unpaid work in the home is generally defined as women’s work regardless of men’s participation. Different notions of masculinities and femininities also exist within the social practices that produce and reproduce gender inequality in housework and health [
23]. Previous studies has shown that a gendered division of housework have implications for the psychological well-being of both mothers and fathers of young children [
6,
8]. There seems also to be a relational affect within heterosexual couples where men’s involvement in housework has the potential to decrease women’s risk of being distressed and unhappy [
25].
Furthermore, housework is widely related to gender as a dominant principle of how society is organized and the gendered expectations we have of each other and ourselves. Thus the gender order, which describes larger societal gender patterns, is another important theoretical concept [
23]. The gender order has been recognised as patriarchically divided, meaning that masculinity norms and practices are socially defined in contradistinction to femininities [
26]. Since women to a greater extent are expected to work in the home and men in paid work, men have the advantage in terms of money, authority, respect, emotional support, control over one’s own life, and so forth [
23]. These benefits can be important resources for maintaining good health, though there are differences and hierarchies among men [
26,
27]. Overall, existing gender practices and expectations in everyday life can impact the conditions by which women and men may experience both stress and wellbeing [
4,
23,
28,
29].
Our theoretical health perspective is based on the assumption that social circumstances and relationships with other persons substantially affect one’s health and wellbeing [
18,
30]. We define health as individual’s physical, mental and emotional experiences [
30]. From our view, health constitutes a dynamic and constant process that includes feelings of well-being, involvement, activeness, and reward in one’s everyday tasks. Thus we believe health and wellbeing is experienced rather than achieved [
31]. Correspondingly, lack of wellbeing often depends on the individual’s subjective feelings about the world she (or he) creates for herself (or himself) and others, and can be seen as the self-perception of feeling ill [
18,
31]. Stress, which may occur when demands from the environment exceed personal resources and thus endanger wellbeing, can contribute to illness. Both cognitive and emotional mechanisms can minimize lack of wellbeing resulting from stressful situations [
32]. In situations when stress has occurred, resignation can be a way of ignore the stressor or being unable to change the situation despite how stressful it may be [
33].
Results
The analysis resulted in the core category “Living within a process of housework resignation” which was built on the categories “Practising gender division in housework”, “Experiencing stress and wellbeing” and “Managing daily life”. The categories were built up by seven sub-categories (Table
2). The results are presented by category and thereafter, the core category is presented.
Gender practices in housework
Both women and men practised a gendered division of housework, establishing a separation between women’s and men’s work at home. The described experiences of constantly being mainly responsible for repair and seasonal outdoor work as living with stereotypical masculinities. As men, they felt obligated to do certain tasks at home, some of which were related to their self-described role as the family’s “main breadwinner.” One man said, “I’m the one who shovels the snow, repairs things that are broken, paints the house when needed and carries heavy things. I often say that she [his partner] has me just for carrying, fixing and paying.” Among men there were explanations that the division of housework was based on expectations of their role as men, and was not a result of open negotiation.
Among women, a gendered division of domestic work caused feelings of living with the burden of domestic work. The women meant that they were mainly responsible for housework, and performed most of the everyday domestic tasks such as washing clothes and dishes, and cleaning the house. Their expressions included: “I have to wash all the time,” “others are just leaving things,” and “I do not want to come home from work and always clean up after others.” The division was not experienced as a result from an open negotiation but was based, instead, on practical reasons: that it just happened to be like this by chance, and that the tasks needed to be done regardless of who performed them. Financial dependence on the male partner further maintained the unequal division, as women who earned less money and/or worked part-time jobs felt obligated to perform most of the work at home.
Experiencing stress and wellbeing
Both women and men described wellbeing as a subjective and emotional experience of feeling good, a feeling flowing in the background of their everyday life and the absence of perceiving illness and stress. Men expressed that when the family was all right, their own wellbeing was good. They also expressed that their wellbeing was good compared to men of similar age, or to their own health history. But when narrating about own daily life the men experienced feelings of stress from stereotyped masculinities due to expectations of the man to always solve problems and repair things. They described feeling drained, stressed, and inadequate because of too many things to do. One man said: “I have done this for so long now so I have surely passed a limit. It is simply too much.” “Passing the limit” included experiences of lacking energy and sleeping poorly because of work-home pressure. There was also descriptions of feelings of stress when the gender equality ideal was inconsistent with practices at home.
Women expressed that wellbeing was: feeling a “tingle in the heart,” mediating your knowledge and experiences with others, being active, and feeling useful. However, the gendered practices in housework contributed to obstacles to women’s wellbeing. For the women, constantly cleaning up after others was accompanied by constant feelings of stress and worries. They described insufficient sleep due to anger at having to clean and wash late in the evenings. One woman said: “I cannot sleep when I’m angry because of the domestic work.” There were also expressions of a need for perceiving wellbeing to manage the burden of domestic work. The women felt that they could not be exhausted when coming home from the job as there was a lot of domestic work that had to be done. One feature of experiences of stress was bad conscience, which the women experienced when the family wanted more attention than they could manage to give. Women also felt stressed when they were constantly disrupted by the family because it made it difficult to have some time of their own. They described a lack of dignity and self-esteem related to feelings of being forced to do the domestic work with no appreciation from the partner, which contributed to a lack of energy.
Managing daily life
Women and men who practiced gendered housework managed their daily lives by escaping and engaging in other activities on their own. Escaping involved: physical activity, time with friends, creative activity, and development of new skills. They considered these activities relaxing and energizing. As another means of escape, both women and men also avoided discussions about the housework which they meant often led to quarrels, irritations, stress, and no change in practice. Women mostly preferred to do all the housework themselves rather than to start a discussion. One woman stated: “It is more like you feel that you’re getting nowhere. It [the discussions] is just irritating and does not lead anywhere. … It is not the chores themselves, because they need to be done anyway. It is rather that others are just leaving tasks undone, and then I have to take care of it myself.”
Among men, one way of escaping was by denying the presence of gender inequality in order to live an easy and privileged life at home without any housework. When the pressure from work and home was, nevertheless, was too high, men used alcohol to cope with the feelings of stress. One man said: “You drink more alcohol when you are stressed … it is a way to relax, I suppose.” Setting housework limits for themselves also helped to reduce stress among men. However, men believed that they should handle stress by themselves and without the help of others.
Another means by which women managed daily life was by searching for strength within themselves and believing that the situation would be solved in the future. Women also found strength from friends who made them feel important and took them seriously. One of the women said: “She [the friend] saved my life. I have told her that as well … she has a lot of empathy and she can talk so one really can see things from a different perspective. She was a life-saver, truly amazing.”
The category challenging stereotypical masculinities represented one way to break up gendered practices in housework among women and men. The participants noted that positive approaches by men to learning traditionally feminine housework practices could minimise quarrels at home. Challenging stereotypical masculinities was also a way for men to handle the fear of being stuck in a fixed masculine roles with limited opportunities to live the life they wanted. Modifying the division and sharing tasks equally between partners was also considered key for decreasing stress and balancing the workload throughout the year. One man explained: “The ideal would be that we shared everything equally. I think I would benefit from that in some sense; it would be rather a relief, actually. An equal share— that is my medicine”.
Women also wished for a more equal share of the everyday work, and for more of a contribution to the work from their male partners. However, women also experienced resistance from their partners when they suggested modifying the division. For example, one the women with university education said “I have tried to do lists, that we [she and her husband] could tick off so we can see who is the one doing the most. But it doesn’t work; it has not been well-received [by the husband]”.
Living with the process of housework resignation
Despite proposing gender equality in housework as a means of improving wellbeing, both women and men continued their daily lives with unequal division of domestic tasks. For example, escaping the situation or searching for strength did not change the housework distribution but enabled the gender inequality to continue. Participants frequently described feelings of weariness and disappointment because of an apparent impossibility to achieve any change in the division of housework. We call this recurring core category living with the process of housework resignation. Feelings of ambivalence among women, who considered their domestic responsibilities both self-evident and unfair, were also associated with this theme. Given previous unsuccessful attempts to adjust the unequal division, participating women were uncertain whether their partner would ever contribute more to the housework. Thus, they felt they had to accept an unequal share. Men, on the other hand, blamed their female partner for unwillingness to perform some of the male-associated tasks and emphasized this point as the main obstacle to change. We understood that women had more limited ability overall to change the situation because of asymmetrical power relations and economic dependence on their male partner, while men were better able to choose between change and resignation. Concomitantly, men admitted that they sometimes had the privilege of periods with less housework while women felt constantly responsible for cleaning up after others, causing them to feel exhausted.
Competing interests
The authors declare that they have no competing interests.
Author contributions
LH, LA and AH designed the study, discussed the results and agreed on the conclusions. LH and LA analysed the data. LH conducted the interviews and wrote the manuscript. All authors read and approved the final manuscript.